Quite often I have believed that harboring anger in the past has been a big contributing factor to my cancer coming forward.
I know that being angry and not letting go is unhealthy...
If a simple thought will make the muscles of your arm go weak or strong, imagine what it must be doing to all of the other muscles and organs of your body! Your heart is a muscle that's weakened by thoughts that disempower (dishearten) you. Your kidneys, liver, lungs, and intestines are all surrounded by muscles that are affected by your thoughts. -Wayne Dyer
I have avoided any feelings of anger since my diagnoses. In fact, I have let go of anger I had been holding for years prior, all with the thought that "I just don't care, all I want is to live" going through my mind.
That is until just recently.
I had someone in my life, mistreat one of my dear friends from my breast cancer support group.
This someone, took advantage of a vulnerable situation in order to feel powerful and in control.
How sick.
And all I want to do is march into his office and tell him how low that is and basically hold a mirror in his face to make him see himself and what he has done from my perspective.
But it is useless,
he has been this way for years, and he either likes it or doesn't care or my guess, doesn't acknowledge it as a problem. I think he doesn't see that is is in the wrong ever and I think that makes it a real illness.
So even though the thought of me just sitting back and letting him get away with this, makes me feel horrible, I don't think I could ever make him see what he has done wrong.
There was also a woman lately, who I purchased something from.
Who has basically ripped me off.
She sold me something broken and won't return any of my money to help pay to fix it.
The BEST part! She brags about being a Christian. This REALLY pisses me off.
The Christian card....it has been played on me so many times in my life.
I was SUED by a "Christian family" for quitting my job and moving to another salon that was too close to theirs, when I was a poor mom trying to feed my child!! I did nothing wrong other than that, but they lost it and began bullying me, they did so for a full year making me cough up thousands of dollars in legal expenses in order to defend myself and prevent myself from having to pay them $100,000.00!!
And this lady now tells me she is a Christian woman but she won't cough up a cent to help me out. Instead she lets greed take over. She sells me something that is broken and then says it is my fault for not checking it out better.
Crazy people.
I know that a true Christian is someone who would act GOD-LIKE
and God would never cheat anyone, and if he accidentally did, he would do what it took to make things right. He would not base his actions on holding onto as much money as he could.
So, the bottom line is, I don't like being angry, I know it is VERY bad for me.
I wish I could let it go...but it is seeming to be very hard.
I believe in standing up for myself and my family.
I believe in preaching what is right and wrong.
But, I guess some people you can't change.
And those people are a lost cause.
I guess with those people...
I need to just walk away,
and be glad,
I am not like them
and hold peace with who I am.
I know that being angry and not letting go is unhealthy...
If a simple thought will make the muscles of your arm go weak or strong, imagine what it must be doing to all of the other muscles and organs of your body! Your heart is a muscle that's weakened by thoughts that disempower (dishearten) you. Your kidneys, liver, lungs, and intestines are all surrounded by muscles that are affected by your thoughts. -Wayne Dyer
I have avoided any feelings of anger since my diagnoses. In fact, I have let go of anger I had been holding for years prior, all with the thought that "I just don't care, all I want is to live" going through my mind.
That is until just recently.
I had someone in my life, mistreat one of my dear friends from my breast cancer support group.
This someone, took advantage of a vulnerable situation in order to feel powerful and in control.
How sick.
And all I want to do is march into his office and tell him how low that is and basically hold a mirror in his face to make him see himself and what he has done from my perspective.
But it is useless,
he has been this way for years, and he either likes it or doesn't care or my guess, doesn't acknowledge it as a problem. I think he doesn't see that is is in the wrong ever and I think that makes it a real illness.
So even though the thought of me just sitting back and letting him get away with this, makes me feel horrible, I don't think I could ever make him see what he has done wrong.
There was also a woman lately, who I purchased something from.
Who has basically ripped me off.
She sold me something broken and won't return any of my money to help pay to fix it.
The BEST part! She brags about being a Christian. This REALLY pisses me off.
The Christian card....it has been played on me so many times in my life.
I was SUED by a "Christian family" for quitting my job and moving to another salon that was too close to theirs, when I was a poor mom trying to feed my child!! I did nothing wrong other than that, but they lost it and began bullying me, they did so for a full year making me cough up thousands of dollars in legal expenses in order to defend myself and prevent myself from having to pay them $100,000.00!!
And this lady now tells me she is a Christian woman but she won't cough up a cent to help me out. Instead she lets greed take over. She sells me something that is broken and then says it is my fault for not checking it out better.
Crazy people.
I know that a true Christian is someone who would act GOD-LIKE
and God would never cheat anyone, and if he accidentally did, he would do what it took to make things right. He would not base his actions on holding onto as much money as he could.
So, the bottom line is, I don't like being angry, I know it is VERY bad for me.
I wish I could let it go...but it is seeming to be very hard.
I believe in standing up for myself and my family.
I believe in preaching what is right and wrong.
But, I guess some people you can't change.
And those people are a lost cause.
I guess with those people...
I need to just walk away,
and be glad,
I am not like them
and hold peace with who I am.
No comments:
Post a Comment