Dream Creator

Dream Creator
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Just a small town Canadian dreamer... This started as the diary of a young woman's experience with breast cancer and continues 5 years later as the diary of a woman, like many other, who has decided to take her lemons and make lemonade. **If reading this blog for the purpose of learning about my breast cancer experience, PLEASE START AT THE OLDEST POST (October 2009) AND WORK YOUR WAY FORWARD**

Monday, January 2, 2012

My Mom. Diagnosis #3

So, many of you know that a few months back I had a prophylactic (that means preventative, to prevent getting more cancer) hysterectomy.
As a BRCA1 gene carrier, my chances of ovarian cancer were around 40% (by the time I reach 70yrs of age) some even say the risks are higher...
So I went and had a total hysterectomy (we'll get to how that is going later).
And last month, my mother did the same.
Well, unfortunately, my mother already HAD ovarian cancer that was undetected in both her fallopian tube and her ovary.
So, her surgery was no longer prophylactic, but instead necessary.
The news came like a hammer to the head.
Same time of year that all of the other diagnosis' have come (almost to the exact day, which must be cursed) A month ago we were told that my mother now has ovarian cancer cause by her BRCA1 gene.
blank.
What do you say?
What do you THINK even?
What the hell do you do.
just awful.
When will it end?
WILL it ever end?
Why is this happening to us?
To anyone?
So much!
TOO much.
Way.to.much.
It's too much
I am pretty much speachless,
It has been a fog since I found out.
Mom is dealing with it better than I thought she would or SHOULD!
Though she says "no more chemo."....
I don't blame her really. It's awful stuff, and at this point, how much trust does she even have in it? She JUST finished chemo for her second breast cancer and this other cancer has been growing there this entire time! (and yes, the same drug taxol is used in both ovarian and breast, so it should have done something to the ovarian tumors)
Mom's surgery is on Tuesday, to see if the cancer has spread.
this is important news in determining her future.
Ovarian cancer is nasty, unforgiving and aggressive.
In my heart I feel like she'll be ok, but this 3rd fight is not a welcomed one.
She's had enough,
It's time for rest.
Time to enjoy the rest of her life, healthy.
I pray for this for her...
Until then, we sit and wait for Tuesday, and Tuesdays results.

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